Recalling some of the things that happened in the past three days, I wrote them down casually. On the first day, I went out for a barbecue with my two children. We went home after that. We didn’t even go out for a walk. I gave up. On the second day, my eldest daughter went to school. I had a few arguments with her when I came back. I was in a really bad mood, so I drove out and drove aimlessly. I was in a very bad mood, turned up the music to the maximum, cried and cursed all the way. My mood improved a little bit. On the way, I thought of going to the place where I first officially worked. I went there with the navigation. When I arrived at the destination, it was just as I imagined. It was almost completely unrecognizable as it was back then. After all, it has been 26 years. The place where I worked back then is no longer there. I can only vaguely remember some of the shadows of that time. Navigated home. I wanted to go fishing for a while, but the river was full of people, fishing, camping, and digging wild vegetables. . . . Seeing the happy people, I thought about my own life, which was a mess. I continued to want to cry. I don’t like places where people gather in groups, so I drove to a road outside the city and smoked two cigarettes to calm my bad mood.  After returning home, I bought some barbecue and a duck outside the community. After returning home, I drank half a bottle of white wine. I bought the white wine at the service area on the way back. I was a little drunk and got up in the middle of the night to vomit. I regretted drinking again. Drinking can’t solve any problems, and it will cause physical discomfort. I felt uncomfortable all day the next day. On the third day, there was nothing to do in the morning. She sent her younger daughter to an interest class and I was responsible for picking her up. There was no conversation for a long time. In the afternoon, she asked me to pick her and the older daughter up from school. The atmosphere was not right on the way back. The older daughter cried and refused to go to school. She was also depressed. She was worried about her older daughter’s life. The college entrance examination was about to begin, but depression broke out. Thinking about the future life of the child, I felt extremely depressed. My mental state is not normal now. I have no confidence in my work and I am always worried about not being able to complete my work. I feel a lot of pressure at work. The cruel reality leaves me with no choice. I can only face reality, do my best and leave it to fate. I can only bow to fate. I hope my life and my destiny can get rid of the cruelty of reality.