On Sunday, I got drunk again. I was completely drunk and had no memory. I couldn’t remember what happened after I got drunk. On Sunday afternoon, I quarreled with her again. Her words broke my heart again. She said that she was indifferent every time I was sick because I treated her badly in the past, out of hatred for me! It was so infuriating! My love and care for her all the time, in exchange for her complete hatred for me? Is there any meaning in my efforts over the past few decades? I was extremely sad and drove to the bar alone to get drunk. At this moment, I was definitely the loneliest person in the world. I was full of pain but couldn’t find anyone to talk to. Soon I finished a bottle of Erguotou. As expected, I was drunk, completely drunk. I was drunk and unconscious. I fell drunk on the street alone. I was sent home by the police. I didn’t wake up completely the next day. I was in pain all over my body, probably because I fell after getting drunk. This drunkenness made me understand one thing, that it would never be possible for her and I to resume our previous relationship. Maybe the love I have always given her has never received even a little bit of her sincerity. My happiness is my fantasy, and she has never loved me. Yes, I regret it. The love and sincerity I have always given are really not worth it. My life is ruined. My life has become meaningless. The pressure of life is very high, and I live a hard life. It takes two people to face it together. However, I can’t get any understanding, comfort, or encouragement from her. All the pressure can be borne by me alone. However, when I return home alone and exhausted, I need to get a word of comfort, understanding, and encouragement from her. Without these, home is the coldest place for me, it is hell! I am just an ordinary person with average ability, fighting alone in this dirty and filthy world. I can’t get any warmth and understanding when I go home. On the contrary, I am greeted with endless harshness. How cold and helpless is my heart? I have talked to her about this issue more than once, but unfortunately, she is like a deaf person and has never understood even a word of mine. Looking back on these years, I can’t even remember that I was happy for even a second. It seems that the words happiness and joy have never appeared in my life! What a sad life! What hope is there in such a life? What is the meaning?