Today, my younger brother sent me a WeChat message about my child’s facial paralysis. I guess my mother told him about it. He said he knew an old man in the hospital who wanted to see the child’s medical records. I was in a bad mood and replied directly to him, no need, I gave up. In the past few years, I have experienced too many hardships. I was almost completely broken down. My child had facial paralysis, but no one found out. By the time they found out, it was too late to save him. What the hell is this? ! It’s ridiculous to think about it. I went to Jinan, Tianjin, and Beijing to find nationally renowned experts, but there was no effect. Last week I also went to see a so-called master… Who should I believe in? Is this my fate? ! I feel that I have been feeling uncomfortable all over recently, and I feel that it should be a precursor to depression. I read a book that said that when depression strikes, the head will buzz, and then the whole world will change, and enter a state of endless dark depression. I feel that I am about to be like that. I am very scared, afraid that I will enter the depression attack mode and lose myself. At that time, the whole world will have nothing to do with me anymore. What will happen to my family, career, children, and the elderly?  I saw a recent news story about a man in Jinan who tied his feet and jumped off a bridge. How cold must this world be to make a man suffer so much that he resolutely abandons everything in this world and jumps off. I am also in pain now, and I don’t know if I have the courage to jump off like that man.